Thursday, April 08, 2004

My head hurts

First the tingling starts in my hands, this is always the first warning. It feels like I have been laying on them until there is no more circulation. Then comes the metallic taste in my mouth, like I have been sucking on an old rusty nail. At this point if I don't have any pills I am screwed. I then get tunnel vision and blind spots.. My speech starts getting slured, and I can't seem to make sense of my own words. I can look right at something and never see it, then the little flashes start, they are like spinning stars and they flash about 100mph, and that is all I can see. The closest way to describe it is flash blind. Like 500 people taking your picture over and over with really bright flash bulbs so your eyes never get a chance to adjust and all you can see are the flashes of light going off over and over.. All of these things start before the pain actually starts, so if I am really lucky I can find a safe place to be. Sometimes I have 2 minutes before the pain starts and other times I am really lucky and have ten minutes. The tingling in my hands starts to fade as this tightness at the base of my neck starts, and the pounding starts in my head, then the flashing stops. I can't stand light as it only intensifies the throbbing, and any sound even as slight as someone breathing makes me want to die. I can't move because it make things so much worse if I move at any minute my head may explode. Even blinking hurts so bad I keep my eyes closed. If I am lucky this happens when someone is around to watch the boys, and I go and lay in a dark room, just laying there as still as I can be, there have been times I actually passed out from the pain which can last anywhere from 2 hours to 4 days never letting up. When it finally starts to give up I am stuck with a bad headache for the next 2 or 3 days. This is what life is like when you have migrains. I think the worst thing is you don't know when or where they will hit. I can go 4 or 5 months without one or they will come 2 or 3 a month. They really don't know why people get them, but they have meds for them. I am on some meds I am suppose to take daily to prevent them, but when I take them I sleep. I can take one before bed and sleep 14 hours get up for 2 and go back to bed and sleep some more, which doesn't work when you have 3 small boys to watch after. I also have the ones that you take when you get the migrain, but I ran out of them so last night I was struck with one of these darn things, luckily it only lasted a few hours now I just have a headache.

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