Forming a sentence

It seems so easy doesn't it? I can't seem to write anything worth reading. There is nothing that seems to inspire me to write lately. I sit here thinking I need to blog, and get nothing. The last few months I have lost any humor that I once had. I can't seem to tell a story or even get my posts to come out with a hint of intelligence. Everything is jumbled in my brain and longing for escape, but somewhere between my mind and my fingers everything gets lost. My stories on the forum have sucked lately also. I just throw them together and post them without even proof reading them or giving them a second look. I am wandering in a fog that seems to get thicker the harder I try! Oh well here goes the details of my day.

I am not a morning person. I don't honestly believe that the day should actually start until around 11am. That way I can get up slowly and have my pot of coffee, and stare at the wall for an hour or so before I have to move to much. This morning I had an appointment with the school nurse to have D's health assessment that is the start of all the other assessments they plan to do, but have still not set a date for, or maybe they have just forgotten to inform me, either way they have until Monday to contact me or I am going to go right back to the school and throw another tantrum. I had to get up early so that started the day off wrong to begin with. Colton and I met with the nurse and filled out 15 pages of paperwork all with no, except for the one question "did you smoke with your pregency?" which was a yes, but not as much as I smoked with the last one, and that was even mild compared to the 2 and a half packs I have been smoking lately, but that is another story. We finished up with the nurse and I am behind on my volunteer time so I went down to Cam's class and signed in to do some time. That really turned into what was more like "run around like a chicken with my head cut off" because I couldn't remember a thing. I was making copies and ended up having to go back 3 time and ask how many of each page do they need, the scary part was I wrote it down twice! I got 3 hours today and still need 4 to get caught up, so I need to get in again this week to fix that before I get so far behind I can't get caught up. We have hockey tonight and I am attempting to cook a prime rib that I was suppose to cook when dad was here, but we got busy and I forgot. I am gonna go watch cartoons with the boys now, I need mindless entertainment!

Remodeling, shopping, and kids

Friday I went to pick up David from school, and Colton stayed home with dad. When I got home Colton was sitting on the stairs with his coat over his head screaming "I just wanna be the baby." and Steve was laughing so hard I thought he might wet himself. He said Colton was sitting there since I left going "whaaa whaaa I just wanna be a baby again and drink from a bottle and pee my pants." He was angry I had left him, but he wouldn't get his shoes on so I left him.

Mom and dad came this weekend so Daddy and Steve could work on the bathroom. If something could go wrong it did, but they managed to get the bathtub, the tub surround, and most of the sheetrock up. So now I have a floor and new linoleum, a bathtub, and some walls! We are actually just going to glue up tile board instead of taping and painting. It will be a lot easier and quicker. Steve has to go out of town to work this week so I may end up putting up the rest of the sheet rock and starting on the tile board. We are so close to having it done it is amazing!

Mom and I took the boy and we went grocery shopping. My boys are usually pretty good in the store, but the last few times I have taken them they have been little monsters. All three of them start running around and being wild. I think it is do to the fact that we have been below zero all last week and they had to have indoor recess. They were bouncing off the walls though and driving me insane. It is 40 today and they have been outside cause they have the day off of school. Tomorrow I have to go to the school and we will start David's assessment.

My mom

Ever since I had kids my mom has been looking for ways to make us all healthy. Really she doesn't even let me buy over the counter cleaning products anymore, because she read somewhere that they attrubite to cancer and all kinds of other health issues. She has now decided to get her own blog to tell the world about all the hazzards of living in a chemical world. Go ahead and check her out! I am always suprised at what information she finds. Mom's blog

JP said and lack of anything better to post

3 names you go by:
Jenn
Jennifer
Mom

3 screen names you have:
jennschall
jennschall1971
I forgot my msn screen name

3 things you like about yourself:
I can't think of one much less 3

3 things you hate/dislike about yourself.
My weight
My lack of organization.
that I am not great at anything.

3 parts of your heritage:
Swedish
Irish
Dutch

3 things that scare you:
Not being a good enough mom to my boys.
Someone hurting my boys.
My boys growing up and leaving me all alone.

3 of your everyday essentials:
David
Cameron
Colton

3 things you're wearing right now:
A big soft sweatshirt
my ugly pink sweatpant
my glasses

3 of your favorite bands/artists:
Tesla
Los lonely boys
Toby Keith

3 of your favorite songs at present:
Heaven by Los Lonely Boys
Rock Me by Steppenwolf
The way it is by Tesla

3 new things you want to try in the next 12 months:
Sky diving (doubt that will happen)
be a better mother
lose weight

3 things you want in a relationship (love is a given):
communcitation
a best friend
trust

2 truths and a lie:(no particular order to keep ya guessing)
I am happily married
I smoke to much
I once owned a 1971 mustange.

3 Physical things about a love interest that appeal:
eye
smile
attitude

3 things you just can't do:
say the words specific and linolium
chin ups
walk without triping at least once a day

3 of your favorite hobbies:
Blogging
Watching hockey
Playing with my kids.

3 things you want to do really badly right now:
go back to bed
choke someone and bury them in the back yard
get more coffee

3 careers you're considering:
I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, been trying to figure this one out for years.


3 places you want to go on vacation:
Hawaii
Alaska
Disney World

3 kids names (either boy or girl):
David
Cameron
Colton


3 things you want to do before you die:
Sky dive
Go to Alaska
learn to like myself

3 people who have to take this quiz now:
Angi
Tricia
Ren

My baby sister and her boyfriend

Some sneaky people!

I got a urgent phone call tonight the voice on the other end saids "Did you know it was Tricia's birthday?" Me: "No it isn't her birthday isn't until June." "No it isn't it is now!" At least someone remembers that I am an idiot and suffer from CRS (can't remember shit).



Why I thought her birthday was in June I will never know, but then I have a hard time keeping the boys' birthdays straight! So Miss Tricia I wrote it down so next year I will not forget.

Famous people who share the Tricia's birthweek:
January 3
JRR Tolkien
Mel Gibson
January 5
Marilyn Manson
Diane Keaton
January 6
Joan of Arc
January 7
Nicolas Cage
Kenny Loggins
January 8
Elvis Aaron Presley

Tricia girl you have pulled me out of some very down times, you have been my friend when I didn't think I had any. I feel like I have known you my whole life, and I have yet to hug you! You are the sweetest, kindest person I know. I miss our late night IM's, and tag comment games! I know that we have both gotten busy with life as it just seem to happen no matter what, but I want you to know that I love you Trica girl, and I will always been here if you need me for anything! I am so sorry that I forgot your birthday! Maybe it was because Steve was yelling at me all day about the remodeling job! YES that is it we will blame it on Steve!

remodeling is work!

So Steve is trying to get the floor out of the bathroom now, there were parts of it that had water damage and he side he is just going to pull it all up. He had to go to work though so I don't know if I will ever get a new bathroom or if I should just turn that one into storage.

If anyone is looking for a charity to donate to please seriously think about Savannah. They are quickly running out of funds and her hospital stay and all the testing they are having to do is costing a lot of money.Savannah's page at the caring bridge has a donation button. They accept credit cards, and pay pal so please do what you can. Savannah has been through so much in her four short years, and Renee has managed to keep her faith through everything they have gone through. I don't think I would have held up so well under all the pressure!

Angi

You were my 10,000 visitor!

We are suffering from middle child syndrome!

Last night was a night from hell. The last few weeks Cameron, the middle one, has decided that he does not have to listen to. He has told me several time that I am not his boss. Well normally I try not to let him bring me to his level. I try very hard to maintain my adult statis, and not argue with him like I am an almost 5 year old too. Last night this child managed to not only drag me down to acting like a 5 year old, he had me crying like I was 2!

The 3 of them were running through the house and being their normal boy selfs, when I asked them to pick up their toys out of the living room floor before the got broken with all the running around. David and Colton acted like they didn't hear me, which is normal. Cameron however looked me in the eye and said "NO" and then he spat at me. I spanked him and told him to go to his room. He told me "I don't have to. Your not my boss." to which I replied "Oh yes I am until you don't live in this house anymore I am." he kept smart mouthing, and I had to walk away from him. I have never been that close to smacking one of my kids in the mouth. I got my wits about me again and took him screaming and kicking to his room. He stayed there until bedtime, which was about half an hour. Then I got his brothers into bed, and he went and got into my bed, but could he keep his mouth shut? Nope, he started again with the " I don't have to do anything you say. I just hate you." Well I know he doesn't hate me, but it can still rip out my heart whenever one of my kids say it. So I did my best to ignore him and he kept at in. I was in the bathroom cleaning up so when Steve gets home everything will be ready to just put back together, and I dropped a large piece of sheet rock on the top of my foot. Still hurts today! Cameron is still going on and on about how much he hates me and I lost it. I told him "I don't even know if I like you anymore, so you better shut up and go to sleep, because I am seriously thinking about giving you away." Well that must of hurt his feeling as bad as he had hurt mine, because I didn't here another word out of him. Then I sat down in the living room and I cried, not because of the hurt foot, I cried because I had talked that way to one of my babies. I cried because I was stressed out and didn't control my anger at him, I cried because at the moment those words left my lips I had meant them. Afterwards I limped into my bedroom snuggled him up into my arms and said "I don't hate you Cam." he says "I know mom, I just make you so damn mad sometimes! I love you mom." "I love you baby with all my heart and soul." and he went to sleep in my arms.

I know that he was just feeling like he needed my attention, and missing his dad, and he has been stuck in the house all week, and I should not have let him get to me, but it happens they learn how to push those buttons and they are young and have lots of stamina. I am old and wore out it is like a wolf pack, they will always go after the sick or injured, kids are the same way they will always go after you at your weakest moments. I think they thrive on it.

The weather outside is frightful.

The snow is piling up and the thermostat is hovering at 3 degrees, when you factor in the wind chill it is -19 F. For those of you that are outside the US using that Celsius system, that would be -16 and -28 with the wind chill. I much prefer our way it doesn't seem so cold that way. I still don't understand Celsius, or metrics for that matter. I guess it is just because I am old and set in my ways. We are expecting 8 to 12 inches of new snow, which is good. They are offering a special this month at our ski hill. For $35 you get snow board lessons, all day lift tickets, and all day rental of your boots and boards. That is what I am getting Cameron for his birthday, both him and David want to learn to snowboard. I was going to take the boys sledding this weekend, but we have to finish the bathroom before we can do anything fun. It is to damn cold downstairs to have to shower down there much longer, and I am looking forward to a bathroom with a door and walls again! So maybe I will just let them skip school one day next week and we will go sledding!

Running behind today!

Well I got the boys to school on time this morning! I was impressed with myself! I cried when I left them, but I knew I would. Then I spent the rest of my morning talking to Angi. She is just as sweet on the phone as she is in this little box. I use to email her with all my raising little boys questions, now I am just gonna call her up! Don't change that number either Angi, I will just hunt you down!

Ok after having this minimized in the task bar at the bottom of this screen for the better part of the day, I guess I will get on with it!

I was late getting Cam from school, not to late though and his teacher is one of my friends so it isn't that big a thang! Angi and Wendy are both doing the lose weight thing, and that is one of my resolutions this year so I am depending on them to set a good example for me to follow! Last summer I lost about 30 pounds and I have gained it all back plus some! Oh god that is just scary! I have no idea where I was going with this earlier so I am just aimlessly typing away at this point so I will wrap it up.

Oh and Tim McGraw is hot, cowboy or not! Just checking to see who is listening! I do know your out there even if you do ignore me!

oh and Angi or anyone for that matter my AIM is jennschall1971 and my yahoo is jennschall.

I get a new bathroom!

Well yesterday Steve went in to fix the wall in the bathroom for me. He was going to fix a 2x2 section of the wall. Next thing I know the wall is completely gone. Then the more he got to working in there the more the walls seemed to come down. The only thing in the bathroom now is the rest of the flooring that is coming up and the sink so I have a place to brush my teeth, because I really enjoy brushing my teeth on a daily basis! We have a half finished bathroom downstairs, it has a toliet and a shower, but no sink yet. The plan was to finish that one then start this one up here. I don't have any walls where the stairs come down so you can actually sit on the stairs and have a conversation with the person in the shower, I know this because I have to sit on the stiars and talk to the boys when they are in the shower. They don't want to be down there by themselves. I think I can spend a couple of weeks like that to get me a brand new bathroom though! Steve had to go out of town to work all week and he took the credit card with him so I can't even fisish it up until he comes home to purchase supplies, oh darn it anyway!

this

this turned into.....

I just have to always stir the pot.

You may not like or agree with the things I am going to bring up today, but hopefully we are all adult enough to understand this is just the opinion of one woman and some logical thinking.

Last night Steve and I were watching VH1's I love the 90's, it was fun to remember all the stuff that went on. The one thing that caused a heated discussion in our house was of course the Waco, Tx. Incident, which brought up Rudy Ridge also. First off I think that David Koresh or however you spell it, was just a freaking loon, but that isn't where I am going with this. Where I am going is that if the ATF or the police or any form of the US government shows up at your house with a warrant for your arrest, the best thing to do it raise your hands above your head and walk out your front door and drop to your knees. If you decided to have a stand off people are going to die and the only person at fault is the person who's name appears on the warrant! People are so quick to blame the government, but what it comes down to is that there was a warrant, in both cases. In both cases the person named on the warrant chose to hold up in their home, to avoid arrest. I am not say that the government acted in the best possible manner, there is room for major improvement there, but it would have all been avoided if Weaver and Keresh had simply walked out and surrendered. The Weaver's claimed something like they didn't know who was out there shooting at them. Oh please come on your a white supremacist who has been selling sod off shot guns to an undercover ATF agent, either they were truly ignorant, which I highly doubt, or they knew exactly who was out there. I mean the jackets that said "US Marshals" and "FBI" pretty much gave it away! The branch dividens well we will give them ignorance, because I mean they actually believed that Keresh was some sort of profit in the first place, and well my views there are a little slanted. I think any woman who wants to let her 12 year old daughter have sex with her husband, a husband she shares with 20ish other women, is more sick than the man having sex with the 12 year old. I would kill anyone who tried that with my boys, you are suppose to protect your children from predators like that not throw them in harms way! So in closing if your every in a situation where the SWAT team surrounds your home, walk out waving a white freaking flag, it will spare your family possible death.

Happy New Year.

Resolutions

With the new year fast approaching I have reflected on the old and what I want to change in the new. I have several things I would like to change like I would love to have a boob lift and liposuction, but somehow I don't think they will make the top of the list this year, unless I find some anonymous benefactor who wants to front the bill for my plastic surgery.

So in the coming year I am vowing to lose weight, I always make that one, and it goes good for about a month.

I am going to go to the Dr, and find out what is wrong with me, I have been fighting these god awful headaches and then I get these tired spells and I get so cold I feel like a dead person. I hate the Dr. but as a good friend said "wouldn't you rather know what is wrong and get treated?" I am not to sure I want to find out I have something incurable though so I have put it off for quite some time.

I am going to be a better blog friend and visit you all more often, part of that has been the headaches, and partly because I have just gotten lazy. I am going to do better.

I am going to be a better mother, I always make that one to, and always fail miserably at that too! I am just not Betty homemaker. I am really good at playing with them and loving them, but the other June Clever stuff just is so darn hard.

I am sure I will have a whole list of my inadequateness, but that is all I can think of right now!

Happy New Year everyone please have a safe New Years eve, and don't put those keys in the ignition if you have had to much to drink I would hate to start the new year with the lose of one of my dear computer friends!

Christmas morning

The boys were all nestled snug in their beds, but they were restless. David was sure that if I didn't get in bed Santa would surly skip our house. Finally 2 hours later they were asleep, and the Jolly fat man did indeed stop at our house. I was made aware of his visit at promptly 3 am, when the light in my bedroom was flicked on and David began yelling "he brought me a digital camera! He really got it for me." and Steve saying "I told you he wouldn't last much past 3." I coaxed him back into bed and we dozed for another hour and a half and then I gave up and we got out of bed and rousted everyone else out too. Mom and dad were here and they showed up at our house just as we were getting out of bed. They stayed in a motel, because my house is tiny. One day we will finish the basement and it won't be so tiny. So we all are making our way into the living room and granny and grandpa were coming up the stairs when it happens. Colton see his stuff sitting on the couch, and the only thing he notices is that there is no damn singing elmo, the only thing he has asked Santa for. Well David has already gotten the singing elmo so Santa couldn't bring the stupid thing, so being the most wonderful big brother on earth David starts tearing through the packages under the tree until he finds the right one. He then takes it over to Colton who is now crying real tears in grandpas arms, and he says "here Colton open this one I got you the singing elmo Colton don't be sad." and all was right with the world again. I am not sure Colton will ever trust Santa again, but he has more faith in his brother now. They got so much junk I don't even have it all put together yet, and I need stock in batteries. They got Leap pad and books to go with it, they got a v tech smile and games to go with it, they got scooters, and roller blades, and games and trucks, they got more stuff than they will ever play with. The big hit was David got a boom box for his room and his digital camera. Cameron got his scooter, and Colton got a plug and play spongebob video game, I know I said my kids would never have them, but maybe I can get the computer back now! I am off to lay down I have a migrain again. I will try to blog hop tonight and check on you all. Hope your christmas was as great as the boy's had.

We wish you a Merry Christmas

The boys are excited for the jolly fat man to arrive, they can hardly wait and I can hardly wait for all the work to be over. It is an awful lot of work for one day, but the boys are worth it.

Please keep Savannah and her family in your prays as they will be spending this Christmas in the hospital. Next one will be much better for them. Savannah will be able to enjoy all the holiday treats she has always had to miss out on.

and for anyone who wants to track Santa norad tracks him every year, and they have a great website my boys love to look at so they know when it is time to get into bed so he will come to our house.
Track Santa

Hope you all have a very Merry Christmas.

It has been another crazy weekend.

Wow Friday I had the meeting with the school. I met with the teachers and the principal. They are getting David all kinds of tests done for learning disabilities, and they are getting him some extra help with his writing, because writing is really difficult for him. After the testing is done we will all review the findings and decide the best course of action. They better have a really good game plan, because if they don't we will have another sit down and include the super intentent of schools, and if that doesn't work grandpa said something about lawyering up and getting shit taken care of! I still didn't get what I wanted to hear from the teacher, she still won't come in and give him any extra help. They went from saying things like ADD to now David is always tired and lethargic, which is a load of crap I have never seen him act lethargic. So that is just baffling to me how they can all of a sudden say one thing and then change it all up when the Dr. says he wants a detailed letter of why they think that. So that is where I stand with the school right now. All I know is that I will be there so much now that they will think I am on the payroll. It is sad that you have to supervise your child's education, when I was younger that would never have happened. I don't know what parents who have to work do to make sure their children are getting the best education possible. After that meeting I got to go to Cam's Christmas party that was fun, they exchanged gifts and did some other fun stuff. Mom came to town to watch Colton for me and then we went shopping.

Steve, me and the boys went shopping last night. David reminded me that I told him I would give him some money for doing some thing around the house and he wanted it last night. I asked him why he needed it right now. He said "I want to get my brothers their Christmas presents." He is such a sweet baby! So I got him his money. I gave him 20 bucks, and him and I started looking at toys. He was looking at some of the things he wanted and I was waiting to see what he would pick. He grabs this one car thing, and I said you want to get them that?

D: "yeah"
Me: "ok"
D: "Well no mom I really want that not my brothers. I want to get them something they really want."
Me: "Ok honey you just get them whatever you want to get them."
We go around the comer and there is that singing elmo. David looks at me and says,
"mom Colton really wants this a lot. He even asked Santa for it, do I have enough?"
Well it was a little out of his price range, but he was putting his heart into this gift giving thing. He wanted to be sure he made his brothers very happy how could I tell him no? So that is what he got Colton, then we walked around looking and found rock em sock em robots. Cameron has asked for that several times, and David remembered so that is what he got Cam. He loves his brothers, sometimes I wonder if my boys even like each other and then one of them does something like that and I know that they really do love each other!
Today is hockey and then mom and dad are coming to get David so he can spend some time at their house with them over the break.

Female

Jay and the recent events over at his house really got me thinking about women. No not like that get your mind out of the gutter.

I am no body builder, but I have always been tough. I have kicked the shit out of a number of guys in my time, and I have had the crap knocked out of me by a few, but I digress so back to the topic. When in life did we as women decide that men were the enemy and we had to prove that we are better than they are? I long for the days that men open the car doors for the ladies, or offered them their seat in a crowded room. I don't really think it is the men that have changed, but women. We have decided that we are capable of doing everything ourselves, we have decided that we will not be the weaker sex. A man tries to show a few manners and we back away like they are the plague. We have trained them that we don't want to be treated as anything other then equal at every turn, but what I ask is wrong with a little chilvery? I love it when Steve carries the heavy stuff in the house for me, and I love it when one of my boys holds the door open and say "Ladies first". I like the fact that my husband tells my boys, "get up and let your mom set there". I find it very attractive when a man can hold on to those values in a world where there are women who refuse those very values. I will continue to raise my boys to open doors for other people, and to offer their seat to a lady, and open and close the car doors for the women in their lives, and to treat a woman like a lady, even if she wants to be treated like a man. I am Steve's equal, I can do anything he can do, but I am also smart enough to know that it is just as good for his ego to let him take care of me as it is for mine that he wants to.