I seldom set foot in the mall, my shopping experiences are limited to the once every 2 week trip to Wal-Mart because I can get everything I need all at once and I don't have to go to 3 different places to do it. I hate shopping, even at Christmas I try to do most of my shopping online so I don't have to actually go into a store! Ok now I am just paddling backward there, on to the point of this little post, and I may have one you will just have to read on and find out for yourself.
Colton likes to go to the food court in the mall and get his favorite pizza, so we picked up Cam from school and headed up there to get some lunch for them. We get Colton's pizza, then get Cam some sesame chicken and find a table. There was a young girl sitting next to us, maybe 16 and she had this little girl with her that was about 3. I assumed that this beautiful little child was her baby sister, and then to my shock and dismay I hear the little one say "mommy where's grandma?" the other child says to the little girl "she will be back in a few minutes to take you home. Mommy has to go back to school." My first thought was why didn't the "grandma" teach this child about birth control, but soon I would have the answer to that question. "Grandma" showed up, and grandma isn't really the word I would choose to describe this woman. She was maybe 32 and I am giving her a few years on that, she was dressed like, well pretty much like a hooker, short skirt, half a shirt, you know the kind of woman that "I am easy" just oozes out of every pore, that was "grandma".
I quickly understood why this little girl had a little girl, she didn't know any better. She didn't have a strong mother influence in her life, now I am not saying that good girls with good morals and values don't sometime find themselves in trouble because some boy coaxed them into the back seat with words like "If you love me you'll do it." and "I just love you so much..." We have all heard those lines, and youth is a great excuse. I am simply telling you what I saw and my opinion of what I saw. I have to wonder if the circle will continue once this baby reaches her teen years, or if maybe just maybe this young mother will teach her daughter about things like condoms and birth control and stop the cycle. Girls need to be empowered with knowledge, it is their body, they will have to bare the burden when when the father decided that he wants to still be a kid and not take on the responsibility of a child. I hope this young mother teaches her daughter about self respect, and she can say no, and that even if she chooses not to say no that is ok too as long as she opts for some birth control. I hope that she teacher her that being a mom at 14 isn't fun, and you miss out on being a kid, and I hope she tells her about STD's, and that no matter how much you think that you love someone at 14, by the time your 16 someone better will come along and by the time your 20 you will have totally forgotten about that little kid crush you had when you were 14 because you found someone you honestly love. I hope she teaches her that she can go to college, and she can be whatever she wants to be in life, and I hope she teaches her that there is no man in the world that can make her happy only she can make herself happy.
I in turn will try to teach my boys that once you choose to have sex you take on great responsibilities, if you happen to knock some girl up you will be held responsible for that child and being a father at the age of 16 pretty much dashes all your dreams of accomplishing all the great things you want to accomplish. I will teach them about condoms, and STD's, and self respect, and how to respect women, and how no means no. I will teach them that love and sex are to very different things. I will do my best to make sure that it isn't one of my boys coaxing your daughters into the back seats of cars and getting them knocked up. I am not so naive to think that my boys won't be out there trying to get a little, what teenage boy isn't, but they will know what condoms are, and they will know how to respect your daughters, and if you teach your daughters the same they will be all the more prepared.