Monday, April 04, 2005

Look at the big picture would ya?

Ok I wasn't going to blog about this, it's all been said and done and it should be over, but yet it goes on and on and on, and lets face it we will never see the end of it, but thanks to a certain extended family member, who shall remain nameless, basically because I don't want to admit I am actually related to him, even if it is only by marriage, has angered me you all get to read my views on the whole Terri Schirvo on goings.

I think that her parents are very selfish and can't see past losing their daughter, but they lost her 15 years ago, she was not the same person they knew before, and there was no hope of her ever being close to that person again. I think it was a waste of time and money to keep her living in the condition she was in for so long, not to mention they stripped her of any dignity she might have had if they would have just let her pass in peace. I hope that I am never faced with having to do that to one of my boys, but I can damn sure tell you that they would not want to live life confined to a bed in a hospice, they would want to live life. I would not want to live like that myself, who really would? All these people that were jumping on the band wagon to bring her food and water just didn't get it she couldn't swallow it she couldn't even put it in her mouth and chew it, she had to be feed through a tube inserted into her stomach, and not hamburgers and French fries, a liquid mix of vitamins and minerals to sustain her body. She didn't know if she was eating or not, and let me tell you if I don't know if I am eating then I sure wouldn't know anything else! Her parents were in such denial, and I pity them I really do, but mostly I feel sorry for Terri, because of what they did to her. We live in a society that cares enough about our pets to make sure that they don't have to suffer when the end comes, we let them leave this world with grace holding their heads high and saying our tearful goodbyes knowing that the pain for them will soon be over, but yet we make our own loved ones suffer unmercifully out of our desire to hold on to what we once had knowing full well that we will never have it again.

Then we move on to her husband, who seems to be getting attacked for loving his wife enough to know when to say "it's over". People seem to forget that he has given up 15 years of his life in this whole ordeal. He watched the woman he loved, the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life with, slip away from him and become something else. Then for some 7 or 8 years he fought to find help for her, he never abandon her, he never divorced her, he held on hoping and wishing she would be the same person he vowed to love until death. He took her to the best doctors he could find, and when they all told him there was no hope he still stood by and when he finally said "the woman I married wouldn't want this" lets let her go, it became a fight. If this man didn't care about his wife, he would have signed all rights over to her parents would have gotten a lawyer and gotten out of any responsibility he once had to her a long time ago. He stuck around and he fought for what he knew his wife would have wanted, he never abandon her, and he was there when she finally did pass on.

I know everyone has their own opinions of this whole case. Some think the parents should have gotten their way some feel the same as I do, and some just don't care one way or another. What I find hardest about this whole case is the government involvement. I don't want someone I don't know or have never met deciding my fate, and I don't want to place my parents, husband, and children in the position of having to say "turn her off". I know that I am loved greatly and no one in my family would hold out for a miracle that long, but I know how hard it is to have to say those words that is why everyone should have a living will.

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